SOOO... im jus doin my normal cleanin... and i decide to make it a Pandora day.. & for the past week or so, i have gotten rid of my fear of love songs... so i put it on Amerie Radio and began moppin... as i clean, songs that i was soo scared to listed to started to come on- and normally i would switch to Jay-Z Radio or Lupe or somethin, but i was totally fine with it... &&& it came to me!!!
I had an epiphanny!! I realized why i was soo afraid of love songs! like ahh duh IVANA!*chuckles* I was afraid of the TRUTH!! i didnt want to hear what was true in my HEART! I didnt want to feel sad, or loved, or vulnerable.. anything that was true, i didnt want to feel it!
I realized, with a bucket of mop water, and PineSol in my hand, that im HUMAN! i cant run away from the inevitable! YES i was hurt! YES im scared! YES im sad! YES i want love! YES i've done my share of heartbreak!! YES TO ALL OF THOSE THINGS I WAS HIDING FROM!!! I cant live my life running away from Ne-Yo, or Trey Songz, cause of my own foolishness!! Good music is good music.. and i should be able to enjoy it!!
YES PEOPLE!!! idk if you may understand how HUGE this is for me! Maybe now i can listen to Trey and not think of what i used to, or hear a love song, and wont cry- ill jus accept it as art that i can relate or not relate to! SOOOOO ADIOS FEAR!!! it wasnt THAT good knowing you.. you were quite annoying honestly, and you cant come BACK!! I got joy back.. and he makes me HAPPY!!!
Now DONT think im SOFT!! id still choose the BIG HOMIE or , Lupe, JCole, or CuDi over ANYTHING... but now i wont change my ipod with such force, if say... Tamia lovey-dovey ass comes on lol... PROGRESS PEOPLE!!
Peace&Love
Beautifullest Bliss
You soft as hell. with your soft ass ass.
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